memories of mom

we had the untypical family set-up. my mom went off to work, while dad stayed home with us. everything i know about running a household, i learned from my dad. i guess this is something my mom will never get over.

this memory was stamped on me when i was 5. i remember waking up at 5am and find her getting dressed for work. she was putting on her stockings and looked up, " cheri, matulog ka pa" (cheri, go back to sleep). i would sit at their bed (my dad would be in the kitchen, preparing her baon (packed lunch) and watch her get dressed.she would purposely avoid my eyes, not wanting to answer the questions there. after getting dressed, she'd say her farewell and head out the door. we werent big on kisses and hugs.

growing up, we had the typical power struggles. we had the same zodiac sign, virgo, yet we disagreed. a lot. she wanted to pass on her cleaning skills to me, so every saturday she'd wake me up early to start cleaning. for me, saturday was for sleeping in after an entire week of school and homework. when i step out of my room, the entire house would be in disarray. she likes to let everyone know she's cleaning. she would then rant about how people were not helping her, how she would die early because we were driving her like a slave...

when i moved out to go to college, i think my mom missed me. she found me a place to stay across from her office so i could drop by from school. she'd make sure i have enough money to last me for the week, bought me food from the grocery that i could bring to the boarding house. she'd wait up for me friday nights so we can take the same bus home. on weekends, she's do my laundry while i slept in. we'd hit the mall for some retail therapy, just me and she. on monday early morning, we'd take the same bus but going in different directions.

through the years, she has learned to let me go, let me be my own person. she found out that i may not have the greatest cleaning skills in the world, but i can cook and do the dishes. she learned that in times that my brother talked back to her, i never did. that even if i didnt win any award or accolade, she can depend on me.

there is a saying that you can only pay your dues to your parents (for all the headache and heartache that you caused them) when you become a parent yourself. i think i have paid my dues.